Friday, October 3, 2008

Blockhead blog entry

Repost of Blockhead's Blog entry 10/03/08
Sweeping Generalizations with Blockhead; Douchebag Things to Say

Sometimes people make comments that are obviously full of shit and/or shortsighted but they stand by it so hard that you can't really discuss it with them unless you're willing to deal with a two hour long argument (myself included)...well, I'm calling bullshit on a few common comments I hear.

"I don't watch professional sports. All it is, is over paid athletes."

Ok, if you genuinely don't like sports, fine, that's totally acceptable. But to say you don't watch them cause of how much money the players make is retarded. You watch movies? Why pay money to see a bunch of overpaid actors? It's the same logic. Of course, athletes get paid way too much money. Shocking revelation! Hey Nostradamus, I hear the sky is blue and shit comes out of assholes. Good call. So, assuming you like sports but just not watching over paid athletes, you must strictly watch little league baseball and the WNBA. Good luck with all that.

"I don't even own a tv."

There is nothing wrong with not watching TV. Duh. It's admittedly pretty stupid most of the time. Doesn't stop me from watching it but that's not the point. People who don't ownTV's are usually four types of people:

a) They like TV but realize it's way too big of a distraction so they can't have one.
b) They can't afford it.
c) People who genuinely are uninterested in TV all together
d) Smug assholes who think not having a TV makes them an intellectual.

Type A is very understandable and, when confronted with a TV, will zone out like they just shot heroin. I feel bad for type B. Type C boggles my mind but they're usually not smug about it, it's just how they are. Some people actually do like reading more then watching "The Hills". Not me, but I can respect that. Type D can suck a dick though cause they talk about it all the time and act as if not watching TV is the secret to being smart. These are people on Myspace in the "television interest" section who write really faggoty shit like, "It's the Anti Christ!" Or "I have better things to do with my time." Just read your books and shut the fuck up. They're worse then preachy vegetarians. Live your life how you wanna live it. Don't try and regulate other peoples shit.

People who say they hate the drug they're addicted to.

Whether it be smoking, coke, tv or whatever...saying you hate smoking, snorting or watching WHILE doing said thing, is both corny and weak. Maybe you shoulda thought about that the first 20 times you did that shit before you got addicted. For a brief period in my life, I'd smoke a cigarette when I was drunk cause it would make me drunker. I hated it, so, I stopped. It lasted about two weeks and the decision was definitive. If you're gonna be addicted to anything, have the decency to admit you love it. Revel in it. Wear "I love heroin" shirts. I realize that lots of addicts get so deep into their addictions that doing the drug loses the high and it just becomes necessity. They hate that they do it and it runs their life. But quit blaming the innocent little drug. If you really hate it, you wouldn't have become addicted to it. You loved it so much, you became addicted. It's like people who hate on a classic album cause they've heard it so much, even though they know every word to it. The only difference is those people stop listening to said album. (And no there's no chemical dependency in Legend by your man Bob Marley or Bizarre Ride to the Pharcyde.)

"I don't masturbate."

If a dude says this, it's just complete bullshit. Obviously...but when girls say it, sometimes, they actually mean it. I'm more calling bullshit on not masturbating as a life choice. Do you hate feeling good? "Man, I hate orgasms. They suck." Do you feel guilty? Trust me, I'm sure jesus jerked his shit all the time. Hell, the Virgin Mary must have too...maybe she had some random sperm on her hands (it's a biblical fact she gave mad handjobs...that's what virgins do) and impregnated herself by accident. Regardless, depriving yourself of harmless and safe pleasure is just plain weird to me.

"My Cat is the Coolest."

Hahahahahaa...fuck that. I realize EVERYONE IN THE FUCKING WORLD says that and I realize everyone who reads this will violently disagree with me. It's no secret I hate cats. I'm totally biased. BUT your cat is not the coolest. You're cat is a predatory animal that only likes you cause you feed it. Stop feeding it and let it fend for itself (eating mice and shit....) see how much it loves you then. Well, it'll probably die of starvation but still, cats are users. They're the animal world equivalent to the girls that go to high post jiggy clubs with the hopes of maybe blowing Wilmer Valderama. They exist for one thing; Themselves. Dogs, however, are the animal equivalent to retarded frat boys.
Dumb, friendly and annoying but on occasion some will flip out and try to kill you. In both cases, I'll pass.

The " 'but he's making money...' " argument

Whenever someone is successful in music or film by way of having no talent, it pisses people off. I'm one of those people. It truly bothers me when talentless idiots do well in life. While, I'm definitely not alone in this kind of hating there is a strong contingent of people who will always throw the "but he's making money..." argument at me. Yes, you are correct, he is indeed making money. Lots of money. Enough money to buy gold ceilings and a pool in his living room. This is true. But this in no way takes away from the fact that that guy (whomever it may be at the moment) is a worthless sack of shit. The other argument is "but he's a good business man." Unless you're talking about Puffy, you don't know what you're talking about. Puffy and J-Lo are really the two shining examples of talentless retards who did well for themselves by being savvy and having good timing. Everyone else is just lucky.
I guarantee you Rich boy and Soulja Boy will never be heard from again. Oh, don't get me wrong, they will make music, but it will never be heard. "But they made their money!" Yes they did..and they are lucky. They struck while the retard iron was hot. However, unlike Diddy, five years down the line they will be broke and a footnote on "I love the 2000's" on VH1. Maybe I'm wrong but I'm fairly certain they're not investing that money wisely.

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